Down the rabbit hole…

Expressing. Engaging. Empowering.

These three words are ones that I find myself using to defeat the scariest of words, existing. Merely existing. That is something that I’ve always run from. Can you imagine just being content with everything in your life? Having nothing to dream about, nothing to hope for. Just perfectly content with your body, your faith, your job or your creative ability. That, to me, is beyond scary and moves to downright terrifying very quickly. When you are truly content you stop changing, stop trying and most importantly stop growing. You stop becoming who you could be and you simply exist. Having the ability and desire to express who you are, what you are, and why you are is such an important part of my life. Yet I have struggled to find my voice. I know what I have to say, I even know how I want to say it. I guess my problems comes about because I can’t quite figure out the right platform in which to do it.

Story Time!

A long long time ago in Florida sometime around 1990, a family was moving out of their apartment and into a home. My sister and I, just barely old enough to remember, and my brother a baby. We were set to grow up like any other hard-working middle-class family. My father worked in the school system and was a swim coach and my mom did whatever job she had to to make the ends meet. And I was the middle child!! Probably a typical middle child, I had my own way I liked to do everything! Making a party out of anything was one of the ways my mom and I connected the deepest. The simplest idea, with just a little creativity and hard work, was set to turn into the best day ever! My parents weren’t perfect and neither was I, but they were the best anyone could ask for. They loved us through anything, they sacrificed themselves to provide for us and to be honest, still do it to this day. They spoiled us rotten enough and disciplined to the point that we knew life wasn’t handed to us. This is one of the many reasons I grew up wanting to be a mom.

If we skip over all the bad and the fun and the happiness and the boring we end up somewhere around deciding to become a hairdresser. I married an old man in a 19-year-old’s body and we were entirely too young. We figured out how to grow up together and even when it wasn’t easy or pretty, we made it through. Being a hairdresser was a fairly easy transition from high school for me. I always knew I wanted to be a mom first off and foremost, but I needed something to pay the bills. Cosmetology was the perfect combination of a creative art but practical enough to make a paycheck. It was also something that would be flexible in the future, in terms of schedule. Nearly ten years later I am still a hairdresser, even though it isn’t something I overly enjoy anymore and I’m not a mom, even though it’s what I want most in this world. But I am an aunt to four of the most awesome kids ever, my friend’s kids are also adopted nieces and nephews and I am surrounded by family. Life is far from perfect but I am always looking for new ways to express my views of this world, engage in every aspect of life and empower myself and those around me.

Oh!! You want to know what this blog is all about!?! Well funny that you should ask!! I’m not really sure. I know you’ll find some pretty cool posts, lots of parties, fun craft ideas, planner junkie stuff, Disney, recipes, oils, and a whole lot of family. Even though everything I read says “DON’T WRITE AN EVERYTHING BLOG (or you will suck).” Ok, maybe I made up that last part, but basically, it’s a do or die thing here. Seeing as though I’m a bit of a rebel, I think I will write about anything and everything that makes my life just a hint different than yours. Maybe that will change and one day I will find one thing I love so passionately that it is the only thing I can write about, until then…. Welcome to my kind of madness!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s